LIFE'S LIGHTER SIDE
• I'll take Shakespeare for 1000, Alex.
• Duct tape won't fix that.
• Lisa Marie was lucky to catch Michael.
• Come to think of it, I'll have a Heineken.
• We don't keep firearms in this house.
• Has anybody seen the sideburns trimmer?
• You can't feed that to the dog.
• I thought Graceland was tacky.
• No kids in the back of the pick-up; it's not safe.
• Wrasslin's fake.
• Honey, did you mail that donation to Greenpeace?
• We're vegetarians.
• Do you think my hair is too big?
• I'll have grapefruit instead of biscuits and gravy.
• Honey, do these Bonsai trees need ...